I don’t have anything against monogamy, like I did it for like… all my relationships from ages 14-20. It was only in November when my last one ended that I started to recognise polyamory and experiment with it and like. It’s just better for me. It’s what fits, it’s what I like.

I have kinks that one partner isn’t into or isn’t confident in; I have that freedom to go and seek out that particular activity without guilt. I have the need for attention, or the need to get laid, and the schedules don’t collide properly and there’s the freedom to still get that out of my system.

Of course there’s always the ground rules; don’t make assumptions, communicate, be safe, get regular tests for gross things, don’t lie, some people are a no-go zone (but honestly I’m the sort of person who is viciously loyal and protective of those I choose to be regular partners with, so that’s not really an issue for me).

and like I wouldn’t mind calling some people my boyfriends/girlfriends/datemates but those are v v select humans right now. aside from that it’s like ah yes we’re fuck buddies. I’m pretty choosy about who I sleep with and actually like also hang around with outside of that? Like there’s only been a few people I’ve done sexual things with in the last few months that I like the company of enough to want to spend extended periods of time with them regardless of whether it’s in a sexual situation or not.

also im rly weird about some kinds of intimacy like cuddling and certain ways/vibes of kissing and like there’s select people I crave affection like that from. sex is sex is sex but that whole side is something that although I still consider myself poly in that regard too I’m even MORE of a picky/selective asshole about it.

but yeah I totally get you.